Guests ask us this one about a week before they book, usually in a text: east side or west side? Here's the honest answer. Both are good. They're good at different things, and the difference is bigger than most travel sites let on.
The short version
Pick the Upper East Side if you want quiet numbered side streets, the museums along Fifth Avenue, and fast trains into Midtown East and downtown. Pick the Upper West Side if Lincoln Center, the American Museum of Natural History, Riverside Park, or Broadway shows are what your trip is actually about. Central Park is on both. That's the part people forget when they agonize over this.
Which side is quieter?
The Upper East Side, and it isn't close. The numbered streets in the 60s and 70s between Lexington and the river are residential blocks: townhouses, a few doorman buildings, dog walkers, and not much else after eight at night. That's the whole appeal for some people and the whole problem for others.
The Upper West Side has Broadway running straight up the middle of it, and Broadway is loud in the good way. Produce stands, movie theaters, people arguing about bagels at nine in the morning. Amsterdam and Columbus stay busy later than anything on our side of the park. If you want to walk out at 10pm and find a room full of people, that's the west side.
The subway math, which is the real difference
This is where the two sides genuinely part ways.
On the east you have the 4/5/6 under Lexington Avenue and the Q under Second Avenue, plus the F and Q together at Lexington Av/63rd St. The 6 puts you at Grand Central in about ten minutes and Union Square in about twenty. The Q runs down Broadway to Times Square, Herald Square and Canal Street.
On the west you have the 1/2/3 under Broadway and the B/C under Central Park West. The 1/2/3 is the fastest train in the city to Times Square, Penn Station and the World Trade Center. The B/C is slower and stops more, but it drops you at Columbus Circle and runs down Sixth Avenue.
So: if your days are Midtown East, Grand Central, the museums on Fifth, or anything on the Lexington corridor, the east side saves you real time every single day. If your days are theater district, Penn Station, or the west side of downtown, the west side does.
What's actually on each side
East side: Museum Mile runs up Fifth Avenue. The Met at 82nd, the Guggenheim at 89th, Neue Galerie at 86th, Cooper Hewitt at 91st, the Frick at 70th. Madison Avenue for shopping, and Bloomingdale's down at 59th and Lexington. Then there's the East River side, which almost nobody visits: Sutton Place, the esplanade, and Carl Schurz Park up at 86th.
West side: Lincoln Center at 65th and Columbus, the American Museum of Natural History at 79th and Central Park West, and the New-York Historical Society right next to it at 77th. Zabar's at 80th and Broadway, Barney Greengrass at 86th and Amsterdam. Riverside Park along the Hudson, which is longer and rougher and better for a real run than anything on the east side except the park itself.
Crossing the park is easier than the map suggests
People treat Central Park like a wall. It isn't. The 66th/67th, 79th, 86th and 97th Street transverses cut all the way through, and the M66, M79 and M86 crosstown buses run them all day. Walking across at 79th takes about twenty-five minutes and is one of the better walks in the city. A museum on the other side is a bus ride, not an expedition.
Airports
From the east side, LaGuardia is the easy one over the RFK Bridge, and JFK goes out through the Midtown Tunnel. From the west side, Newark is the easy one through the Lincoln Tunnel. It's a small factor, but if you're flying Newark twice it stops being small.
Families
Both work. The west side has the Natural History museum, wider sidewalks and more playgrounds packed into fewer blocks. The east side has the park zoo at 64th, the carousel, the model boat pond at 74th, and quieter streets to push a stroller down. We'd give a slight edge to the west side for a first trip with kids under six, and to the east side for anyone who values a quiet night's sleep.
Where we sit in all this
We're at 341 East 62nd Street, in Lenox Hill, firmly on the east side. Central Park's Fifth Avenue entrance at 60th is about an eight minute walk through the quiet blocks. The closest subway is the F and Q at Lexington Av/63rd St, and the Roosevelt Island Tram is a two minute walk if you want the best cheap view in the city.
We rent apartments, not rooms: studios up through the whole house, each with a kitchen. No lobby, no key card, just your own front door. Your door code comes by text before you arrive. We don't have a rooftop or a gym, and we'd rather say that here than have you find out on arrival.
If your trip is museums, Midtown meetings and quiet evenings, we think the east side is the better bet. If it's Lincoln Center and three Broadway shows, book the west side with our blessing and come across the park for the Met.